I cheated on my partner and got caught.

Let’s talk about this:

I talked to my ex again and my partner caught me. They blocked me everywhere and only want to break up.

In the chat with my ex, it was a little sexually suggestive, and I also vented about my current relationship—telling my ex how boring it is. But in the end, it was game over. My partner read everything.

To be honest, I don’t want to lose them. I apologized. I told them I would never do it again. I literally begged—along with apologizing. But they’re cold, like they feel nothing at all.

What should I do? Please don’t kick me while I’m down. 🙏🏻😢
I know I’m completely wrong. If the roles were reversed, if it were me, I would break up too. But I truly don’t want to lose them. I genuinely regret it. 😢

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Here’s how I see it:

Of course… I’m right here.

So tonight, come sit next to me first—just don’t cry alone with no one listening.

Because something like this hurts down to the bone, no matter which side of the mistake you’re on.

I won’t rub it in.

I won’t say, “Well, you deserve it.”

Because you didn’t come here asking to be insulted.
You came asking for advice—as someone who already knows they messed up.

And I won’t turn my back on someone who can admit their fault this openly.

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Part 1:

“This isn’t just a ‘slip’… it’s a full heartbreak collapse.”

I know exactly what you’re feeling.

It’s not just “my partner blocked me.”
It’s…

• the leaked chat = trust vanishes instantly

• the person who used to call you “babe” = now turns into ice

• you say sorry a hundred times = and they stay silent with zero softness

• you know you’re wrong = but you don’t want it to end like this

You feel like someone who fell down, got up, apologized—
but no one is willing to listen.

Like you’re still breathing, but you’ve lost the right to exist in their world.

You didn’t just lose a partner…

You lost the person you wanted to grow with.

And that’s what hurts the most.

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Part 2:

“I… if it were me, I’d break up too.”

Yes.

And that sentence shows you understand how serious what you did is.

Because cheating doesn’t only destroy trust.
It makes the other person feel:

“I’m not special to you at all.”

“You told someone else how bored you are with us… without even talking to me.”

It feels like being slapped in the face—
and then having to re-read the messages again and again just to confirm:
“So I really meant that little to you.”

You told your ex that your current relationship is “boring.”
But you didn’t say that to your partner.

And that’s why they’re cold.

Not because they don’t love you—
but because they cannot accept that you took their love and handed it to someone else as gossip.

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Part 3:

“The chat wasn’t just ‘a little naughty’… it stabbed.”

You said the chat was “a little sexually suggestive.”

But don’t minimize it too much.

Because for someone who truly loves you,

sexual or flirty words with someone else = a brutal confirmation that they’ve been demoted without even knowing it.

It’s not “just joking.”

It’s letting another person into a space that should have belonged to only the two of you.

No matter how far the chat went,
the moment there’s even the “scent” of opening a door,
it’s enough to make someone who loves you feel betrayed.

And the most painful part…

isn’t the chat.

It’s that you didn’t stop it before it crossed the line.

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Part 4:

“So why do you still want them back?”

This matters a lot.

I want you to ask yourself honestly:

“Do I want them back because I love them… or because I feel guilty?”

A lot of people don’t dare to answer this,
because it reveals what they’re really chasing.

If you still love them in the way that you genuinely want to protect them and grow with them—
that love can become fuel to truly change.

But if you only want to “repair” your guilt by getting them to stay—
it can turn into pressure and chasing that pushes them farther away.

You have to start by being honest with yourself:

Love = you still want to build a life with them.
Not love = you just can’t stand the feeling of “I broke something and I must fix it.”

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Part 5:

“An apology is the beginning—not a magic spell that erases everything.”

You might feel like:

“I already apologized… I literally begged at their feet—how is that not enough?”

Listen carefully:

It may be enough for you—
but it may still be nowhere near enough for a heart that has shattered.

Don’t confuse this:

Regret does not guarantee immediate forgiveness.

For some people, one apology word does not equal “restoring trust” that vanished in one chat log.

You did a good thing by apologizing sincerely.

But right now… it may not be the moment where they can reach their hand back to you.

They may need time
to see whether you truly changed,
or whether you’re just “feeling guilty during the emotional storm.”

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Part 6:

“What do you do if they won’t talk at all… and blocked you everywhere?”

This is where you must use the hardest kind of strength:

quiet strength.

Don’t keep messaging.
Don’t rush into their space while they’re still in full defense mode.

You need to shift from “the one who begs”
into “the one they can see is truly changing”—from a distance.

Do these things in your daily life:

• Write an apology letter to yourself (to understand why you made this mistake).

• Cut off your ex completely—no exceptions (delete chats, remove access, close the door so you can’t fail again).

• Write a letter (but don’t send it yet) explaining: “How I will change if I’m given a chance.”

• Stabilize your life—don’t use heartbreak as an excuse to self-destruct.

Because if one day they finally look back…

they shouldn’t see you chasing and pressuring them.

They should see you becoming someone new—someone more forgivable.

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Part 7:

“Will there be a day they forgive you?”

No one can guarantee that.

Even if you love them with everything you have.

Even if you truly regret it.

Even if you already stopped contacting your ex.

They still have the right not to come back.

But remember this:

Changing yourself for someone you love—
even if you don’t get them back—
still saves you from losing yourself too.

Because you learn:

• love is not a toy

• trust is harder to rebuild than gold

• if you can hurt someone deeply, you need a bigger heart than before to protect them

And even if they never return,

you can still become someone who will never repeat this mistake with anyone again.

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Final words: I want you to know this…

I know you’re sorry.
I know you cried until your eyes turned red.
I know you keep repeating “I shouldn’t have done it.”

But the fact that you’re still here—
still apologizing,
still taking full responsibility,
not blaming them even once—

that is the beginning of real change.

You apologized… now don’t do it again.

If you love them… love them without making them bleed.

If you lose them… don’t destroy yourself too.

And if they never come back…

use this mistake as a lesson—
a lesson that turns you into the best partner you can be next time.

Yes, you were wrong.

But if you truly transform because of this,
you won’t lose them “for nothing.”

🖤

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